iLoveBooks

Thank you, Book City Jackets. I couldn't agree more. 

Foolish Me

It's amazing to me how dance can so perfectly convey deep and complicated emotions, sometimes through the simplest of movements. This performance from last week's episode of So You Think You Can Dance left me with tears in my eyes and a heavy heart, but also in awe of the artistic power of dance. 

In just two minutes I felt swept back to the excruciating pain I felt a few months ago when my first serious relationship ended with a complete betrayal of my trust, both by the boy I cared so deeply for and a person I had previously considered one of my closest friends. The lyrics to this song (Fool of Me by Meshell Ndegeocello) are so piercing and terribly accurate. You can feel the soul and hurt in her voice when she sings. So many of us allow ourselves to be made the fool by giving our whole hearts to someone only to be pinned up against a wall of lies and abuse in the end. I hate it. 

But I suppose it's only through suffering that we learn how to protect ourselves and break through those walls to find people who truly care. It's difficult though--so difficult when such a great majority of people have no qualms about making choices that sacrifice the well being of those around them. Relationships are such complicated, twisted journeys... I'm far from understanding them, but at least I think I know better than to let someone make a fool of me again. 

<3 Lyssa

Parisian Ponders

Tonight I sat in row two of theater eleven at an Orange County theater but felt transported back to France thanks to the film stylings of one Woody Allen with his newest flick, Midnight in Paris. A blockbuster or academy award winner...no, but a well-made, well-casted smart comedy with spot-on reflections on the varying reactions to Paris by Americans...yes. 

The backdrop of Paris just makes everything better and kicking off a movie with a five minute reel of glamourous arial and street shots of the magical city was a great editing decision. I was immediately reminiscing my trip there and got caught up in that intangible longing to travel again. That longing makes you (or at least me) identify with the protagonist who is jaded by the LA film industry and aspires to move to Paris and write a novel instead of another lack-luster script. Without spoiling the tale, suffice it to say that there are many road blocks between him and this "perfect plan"--one being himself and his inability to believe in his talent and embrace the present. 

So I'll admit it, I totally share that inkling towards nostalgia and the romance of years past with Owen Wilson's character (Gill). I don't know how many times I've thought, "I would have been so much happier growing up in Europe in the 20's." I find myself daydreaming about life in other cities of the United States constantly thinking how much better  things must be there. In reality, I live in California where the sun mostly always shines, the beach is 15 minutes away and there is an infinite variety of anything you could ask for. I need to take a hint from Gill's discoveries and embrace my current situation and the potential for inspiration just outside my balcony. 

But while embracing the now is an excellent ideal to live by (thank you Buddha), I think find it equally important to study and appreciate the past...to remember what life was like without the internet and how a hand-crafted letter could be the your only contact with a lover or friend for months upon months. Learning and growing from the past is never too old-fashioned in my book. 

But enough of my thoughts. There was one line from the movie that I just loved and thought I'd share: "All cowardice comes from not loving, or not loving well enough." Ernest Hemingway's character  shares this thought while he tells Gill how true love should make a man forget his fear of death and feel immortal, even if just for fleeting instants now and then. I find this concept curious and interesting to ponder. I hope you do too... 

A $6 "trip" back to Paris and a chance to hear the french language in all it's glory...now that's what I call a French lunch break ;) 

<3 Lyssa

Gold in the Air of Summer

Not only is this a good Kings of Convenience song, it is my mantra for these next couple weeks. I recently did a colors personality exercise at a retreat and learned that I embody the color GOLD, meaning that I live by to-do lists, thrive in organized environments, love shopping for planners, feel most comfortable when things are planned out, and am extremely detail-oriented. For those of you who know me, this description fits me to a T. In addition to the golds, there are the Oranges: the energetic, competitive, constantly up-beat people who always have their hands raised in class and have a random idea for what to do on a Friday night, the Blues: the calm, caring, compassionate people who will always be there to listen with great advice and a shoulder to cry on, and the Greens: the analytical, logical people who weigh every option before making a decision and are great in leadership positions. I think it's so important to remember that there are these differences amongst people: they determine the way we learn, the way we think, the way we handle problems, and the way we see the world. Too often we are tempted to mold ourselves to fit whatever group of friends or social environment we are in, and although this is important to a certain degree we still have to know the kind of person we are inherently and embrace that.

Yes, I am a bit of a nerd. Yes I LOVE school supply shopping and getting a new planner is like Christmas for me. Yes the idea of doing something completely out of the blue kind of freaks me out. But these qualities make me a responsible person and a loyal friend, two things I value highly. So my advice: know your color and embrace your color, because it takes a little bit of every color to make anything work and luckily, we all go together quite nicely :)

Another thing I learned during this exercise was that when you are stressed your second most prominent color comes out--mine is blue. With the end of the school year rapidly approaching and deadlines piling up I have been beyond stressed and very emotional, which is where the "air of summer" comes in... It helps so much to remember that in a couple weeks everything will be finished and I will embark on my last real summer break, which is already filled with promise and opportunity.

I have plans to share an apartment with a great friend, work full time in the Marketing Department at Fairmont and really be able to feel more integrated in the department, experience new places in Orange County and LA, take a trip to San Francisco, celebrate one of my best friend's wedding, and, most importantly, RELAX! Summer is truly a magical time of year, and the promise of the coming months is a great motivation to keep you going. What are your summer plans? Let your Gold side shine through and make a list :)

<3 Lyssa